We have now come to the end of my year of self love. I know that I am so blessed to be able to do what so many people dream off. To take a year off to work out why I am here, to heal relationships, to heal myself and along with my husband and best friend too.
Tim and I moved to beautiful Andalucia in February last year. We had a buffer of money and a regular income from our network marketing business so that we could really take time for us. Have lazy, miracle mornings. Watch sunsets. Host an abundance of friends in our beautiful home. Play with our furbabies. Watch netflix without guilt. And after Tim's twenty year career in the post office where he got up each morning at 5am, slept all afternoon and worked most Saturdays - reconnect with each other.
I have learned so many things. Without a doubt we are both still on the self love journey but I definitely have realised that the kinder I am to myself the more I have to give others. I can then give unconditionally without burning out and ending up feeling resentful.
So these are a few of my favourite ways to start loving yourself the way you absolutely deserve to be loved.
1. Slow down. After years in corporate world with deadlines and clock watching bosses I felt the need to be 'on' all the time. I now realise that my best and most inspirational ideas come to me when I am walking in our beautiful countryside, taking a show, doing stuff for me. One of these ideas can be worth tens of hours sat in front of a computer being busy.
2. Interrupt my patterns. One of my favourite techniques I have learned over the years is to watch what words come out of my mouth as these words can easily become my reality. I watched a training video online where the trainer taught the phrase 'Cancel, clear, delete' if you say something about yourself that isn't kind or that you wouldn't want to come into reality. It has really got me noticing my un-resourceful self talk.
3. Set fewer goals but more meaningful ones. I have always had a belief that life is too short and wanted to fit so much in. This often ended up with me feeling exhausted and not looking forward to things so much as all I wanted to do was sleep! This year I have set fewer goals but each goal has been carefully selected for how achieving it will make me feel. Th
4. Soften my inner critic. We all have them, that voice that says you are not good enough or that you could have done better. I probably do more work with my clients on this than anything else. My inner critic used to call me Jo in a really disparaging way. I know call myself Jo Jo and it feels warm and friendly. 'Come on Jo Jo, you can do this but perhaps you need to prepare a bit more'. My inner critic has become my cheerleader and encouraging mentor but one that gets things done!
5. Take regular social media detoxes. I love social media for so many reasons but I also despair of it. I see so many people who compare themselves to others, who spend hours scrolling through news feeds and feeling their mood sink with each perfect status especially if they were feeling out of alignment. I now have a sacred morning with no social media and will take days with no access to Facebook. Guess what life still goes on and I feel so much freer.